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Fatal Attractions

By adultery, Love, Lust, Marriage No Comments

The 1631 edition of the King James Bible infamously became known as the Wicked Bible due to a printing error of Exodus 20:14. Because editors inadvertently omitted the word “not” from the verse, God’s marital commandment read, “Thou shalt commit adultery!” Though only ten to fifteen copies of the misprint remain, a quick survey of our modern commitment to marriage aligns better with the adulterous version of Scripture.

Roughly 70% of television and streaming programs contain sexual content. Around a third of popular sitcoms include adultery as a major plot or theme. According to the General Social Survey, one out of five married men cheat on their spouses while one out of seven women choose to do the same. The commonality of sexual deviance, however, does not make it harmless.

Despite these cultural trends, I remain convinced that most people, even in our permissive society, do not desire to live immorally. Recent surveys suggest that 89% of Americans realize that adultery is wrong (Pew Research). Chances are, someone reading these words is fighting this sin, leaving you feeling trapped and defeated. Many people who love Jesus simply lose their way and find it difficult to get back on the straight and narrow path (Matt. 7:13-14).

Thankfully, failure and wickedness do not have to be the end of our story. In His Sermon on the Mount, Jesus addresses not only the eternal consequences of adultery, but also its internal causes (Matt. 5:27-30). In doing so, He reveals that sexual sin is not only evidenced by what we do, but also by what we desire.

 Jesus first acknowledges the straightforward declaration of the Ten Commandments; You shall not commit adultery (Ex. 20:14; Deut. 5:18). His effort to raise the standard of our understanding is not an indictment of the Old Testament, but a correction of the misinterpretations of the scribes and Pharisees, who diminished the importance of the command (Matt. 5:27).

Simply put, the Bible forbids any sexual relationship outside of a marriage between a man and a woman. “Marriage is to be held in honor among all,” says the writer of Hebrews, “and the marriage bed is to beundefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge (Heb. 13:4).” Adultery, by definition, is the choice of a husband or wife to share a sexual act with anyone who is not their spouse. Due to the sacredness of marriage, a single man or woman can also be guilty of infidelity by choosing to participate in a physical affair.

Long before we dishonor God with our hands, though, something is amiss in our hearts. To help us, Jesus moves from the reality of adultery to its root, teaching that to look at another lustfully is indicative of a cheating heart (Matt. 5:28). Here, the emphasis is not a coincidental glance, but a carnal gaze. Lust causes us to want what we do not have, making it impossible to enjoy what we do have. Ultimately, whatever we rest our eyes upon has the power to control us.

Serious believers must take an introspective look and be honest about what is there in order to heed Jesus’ words. What do our private longings reveal about our hearts? What do our media habits show? What do we dwell upon that no one else sees? What do our secret fantasies reveal? What do our thought patterns expose? Part of preventing adultery is refusing to hide in our deepest struggles.

By facing our temptations with honesty, we are ready to take action. Jesus employs hyperbolic language to motivate us to abandon anything that prevents our purity, destroys our marriage, or hinders our spiritual growth (Matt. 5:29-30). The suggestion to gouge out our eye or cut off our hand is not a literal command. The implication is that no sacrifice is too great if it helps us avoid devastating sin.

So, if adultery is destroying your life already or germinating in your soul, let me suggest three steps back toward God. First, repent honestly. Refuse to make excuses. Do not blame your spouse. Own your transgression. When King David forsook his marriage vows with Bathsheba, he pleaded with God due to his self-identified iniquity, transgressions, and sin (Psa. 51:1-4). Infidelity is not an unforgiveable sin, but a great evil that we must acknowledge and turn from.

Second, remove any stumbling blocks that feed or protect your sin. Jesus is not calling us to self-harm, but to ruthless honesty over our weaknesses. Refuse to spend time alone with the opposite sex. End unhealthy relationships. Delete apps from your phone. Install accountability software on your devices. Resist movies or music that feed you incessant lies about sexual desire or fulfillment.

Finally, depend upon Christ to change your heart. Ultimately, only God can transform our desires and ambitions. No legalistic list can substitute the supernatural work of God’s grace. Again, King David is illustrative as he prayed for a clean heart and a renewed spirit (Psa. 51:10-12). So, dwell on the beauty of Christ and His work. Seek to joy in Him more than this world. Pursue the satisfaction of holiness rather than the fleeting pleasures of sin. Christ will not only forgive, but He will also transform us and set us free.

Adam B. Dooley
March 12, 2026

How Much Does It Cost To Follow Jesus?

By Christian Living, Discipleship, Love, Priorities, Righteousness, Surrender No Comments

How much does it cost to know Jesus? Well, it depends.

In one sense, following the Lord is entirely free. Scripture is robustly clear that we cannot earn the grace of God. We cannot buy His forgiveness. None of us deserve the salvation that our Savior alone provides.  No amount of sacrifice, effort, or work would ever be enough to merit any part of our redemption. Grace through faith alone is the recipe (Eph. 2:8-9).

Yet, in another sense, the grace by which we are saved never remains alone (Eph. 2:10). Ultimately, walking with God will cost you everything. He demands your whole heart and life. Your family and loved ones belong to Him. Your wealth and possessions are rightly His. Your future and dreams must bend to His direction. We are but stewards who manage the reality God entrusts to us.

C.S. Lewis aptly explained, “Every faculty you have, your power of thinking or of moving your limbs from moment to moment, is given to you by God. If you devoted every moment of your whole life exclusively to His service, you could not give Him anything that was not in a sense His own already.”

Thus, every moment of every day is for Him. Every dollar we accumulate is for Him. The job we go to is for Him. The family we enjoy is for Him. The future we seek is for Him. Nothing about our lives is off limits when we identify as a Christ follower. These parameters are key to understanding one of the stranger statements Jesus made during His earthly ministry. The first time I read these particular words it took my breath away.

“If anyone comes to Me,” He said, “and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple (Luke 14:26).” Even when you understand that Jesus is using hyperbole, the statement remains jarring.

How can these words possibly be true in light of the Bible’s seemingly contradictory imperatives? Scripture instructs husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church (Eph. 5:25); wives are told to respect their husbands (Eph. 5:33); children are to honor their parents (Ex. 20:12); and a refusal to provide for your family is a sign of unbelief (1 Tim. 5:8). Even more broadly, Jesus Himself insisted that we should love our neighbors (Matt. 22:39) and enemies alike (Luke 6:27). Christians from every generation have correctly understood that love is a hallmark of genuine faith.

So, what biblical principle could possibly emerge from such a direct, unexpected command? To understand our Savior’s application, we need to first appreciate that varying degrees of love are not only normal, but also healthy. For instance, as a Christian man I want to love all people generally by being a good neighbor. But, as the pastor of a local church, I love the congregation I serve differently because of the beautiful relationship that exists between a flock of believers and their earthly shepherd. Additionally, though, I have close friends that I have laughed with, hurt with, and rejoiced with whom I love at an even greater level.

Yet, none of these remarkable friendships even compare to the deep connection I have with my family. I love my parents more than anyone on the outside because they gave me life and shaped the man I am today. My children are at a greater level still, because as bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh I see myself and the future in their eyes. But my wife, my precious helpmate, is my greatest earthly love. Because we are one flesh, both her successes and burdens are equally mine. No one even begins to compare to her.

These degrees of love are not only proper, but they also promote healthy boundaries by which I protect the people closest to me. We should love ALL people, but NOT in the same way. Relationships of all kinds are important, but none should compare to those between parents and children, brothers and sisters, husbands and wives.

Except for one.

When Jesus speaks of hating those who are closest to us, He is not suggesting that we loathe, resent, or despise family members. Rather, His principle is intended to compare and contrast. The idea is that as much as you care for your relatives, and even yourself, you should love them LESS than you love God. The things and people you prize the most in this life must pale in comparison to your love for Christ. In terms of depth and degree, being a disciple of Jesus means that we love Him even more than our families.

Realizing how costly such a commitment is, our Savior offers two parables to drive His point further home. Just like a builder who constructs a tower will first assess the obligations of construction (Luke 14:28-30), we must decide if we are willing to pledge ourselves to the Lord without reservation. Or, if you prefer, like a king who calculates the probability of victory before going to war (Luke 14:31-32), we reckon with the price to be paid before identifying ourselves with Christ.

In a modern world that continually dumbs down the gospel and dismisses the importance of doctrine in an effort to make it as easy as possible to follow Jesus, these words are particularly sobering. To the contrary, our Savior is saying that every person is free to decide that the Christian faith is not for him, but he is not free to redefine what biblical faith is. You are free to make whatever choice seems right to you, but you are not free to categorize anything less that total surrender, affection, and commitment to Jesus Christ as Christianity. Count the cost and choose carefully.

Adam B. Dooley
January 21, 2026

Love in the First Degree

By Accountability, Christian Living, Faithfulness, Holiness, Love, Obedience, Priorities, Righteousness, Salvation No Comments

Loving God and loving people is all that matters.

Those were the words in an angry email I received the day after preaching a sermon about personal holiness. Intended as a less than subtle rebuke, the writer was eager to correct what he labeled as my “overemphasis on obedience.” Any directives about resisting temptation or regulating behavior were, he insisted, hateful and legalistic. Or, to put it differently, conforming to the standards of Scripture was an unnecessary distraction to the simple hermeneutic of loving God and loving others sincerely.

On the surface, the argument is convincing. After all, Jesus Himself identified the two greatest commandments as loving God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength (Mark 12:30) while also loving your neighbor as yourself (Mark 12:31). The problem, though, is a false dichotomy that fails to consider how we best exhibit genuine love for God.

The moment we substitute loving God for obeying God, we step outside the boundaries of our Savior’s intention for His people. Nowhere does the Bible teach that we simply love God rather than obey Him. Quite the contrary, the consistent witness of Scripture reveals that the greatest expression of our love is obedience. In fact, Jesus not only insisted that we love Him, but He also clarified how we can best do so. “If you love me,” He said, “you will keep my commandments (John 14:15).”

Concluding that since salvation is a gift of grace, we are free to live however we choose is both reckless and misleading. The Apostle John warns us that, because “God is light and in Him is no darkness at all, if we say that we have fellowship with Him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth (1 John 1:5-6).” The analogy of darkness presents the deceptive waywardness of sin as antithetical to the light of a relationship with Jesus.

True believers refuse to misconstrue the grace of God as an excuse for remaining in their transgressions. No one was clearer on this point than the Apostle Paul, who asked rhetorically, “Are we to continue in sin so that grace may increase? May it never be (Rom. 6:1-2)!” Though we are born again by grace through faith apart from good works (Eph. 2:8-9), the goal of salvation is transformed lives characterized by radical change (Eph. 2:10). The seed of redemption is, without question, the grace of God revealed in the gospel of Jesus, but the fruit of salvation is obedience to and joy in the ways of God.

Perhaps an illustration will shed light on the marriage between our love for God and the actions He commands. Admittedly, no human relationship can completely mirror our connection to Christ, but let me share a story that comes close. Years ago, while dying of a crippling neurological disease, David Ireland came to grips with the reality that he would never hold, kiss, or play catch with the unborn child in his wife’s womb. In his book, Letters to an Unborn Child, Ireland desperately communicated his love for his future son or daughter.

In one of his letters to the child, David included the following description of his remarkable wife: “Your mother is very special. Few men know what it’s like to receive appreciation for taking their wives out to dinner when it entails what it does for us.”

“It means that she has to dress me, shave me, brush my teeth, comb my hair, wheel me out of the house and down the steps, open the garage and put me in the car, take the pedals off the chair, stand me up, sit me in the seat of the car, twist me around so that I’m comfortable, fold the wheelchair, put it in the car, go around to the other side of the car, start it up, back it out, get out of the car, pull the garage door down, get back into the car, and drive off to the restaurant.”

“And then, it starts all over again; she gets out of the car, unfolds the wheelchair, opens the door, spins me around, stands me up, seats me in the wheelchair, pushes the pedals out, closes and locks the car, wheels me into the restaurant, then takes the pedals off the wheelchair so I won’t be uncomfortable. We sit down to have dinner, and she feeds me throughout the entire meal. And when it’s over she pays the bill, pushes the wheelchair out to the car again, and reverses the same routine. And when it’s over—finished—with real warmth she’ll say, “Honey, thank you for taking me out to dinner.”  I never quite know how to answer.”

The point is that you will do anything for someone that you love. For Christians, that means obeying God is never a burden. Gratitude, rather than guilt, drives every believer to honor Christ in word and deed.

Good works may not be the cause of our relationship with the Almighty, but they are the consequence of it. Scripture describes faith in God that fails to produce life change as dead and worthless (James 2:14-26), even as it encourages us to look for deeds appropriate to repentance (Acts 26:20). Jesus Himself explained, “If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free (John 8:31-32).”

Openly celebrating or continually practicing sinful behavior is entirely contrary to saving faith, no matter how passionately we insist otherwise. Frankly, doing so is the opposite of loving our Savior.

Adam B. Dooley
October 22, 2025